i tot i was being nice.
but it turned out tt ive made the wrong decision
(why did i always feel tt i made the wrong move)
all i wanted was you benefitting from my decision.
but now all the effort i made and the trouble i go thru arent worth it anymore
cos you dun appreciate it and then afterwhich i felt so disheartened.
at least now i uds, and i wun make the same mistake the next time
maybe i was being a little too friendly. a little too helpful. and a lot more too overbearing.
i dun wanna try agn.it's so heart-wrenching and demoralising
maybe distance does make the heart grows fonder.

i guess im pretty much on my own now

tml's monday agn but im nt gg to let tt affect my dating today(;

the inter jc pageant @the arena

NJ and NYJC candidates(:














Girls top 5(:















Guys top 5(:














Top 5 Mr popular(:















Top 5 Ms Popular(:

work is quite gd today...except for the nagging from irene when we're abt to go hm
she can be so insensitive sometimes
so i din bother to be nice to her.
but i din meet any difficult customers today!
hooray!(:
and i got to noe 2 dealers who are nicer!
at least now my job is getting better and i have gd company like xueshuang n sam with me!
i sure hope dis kind of situation lasts!
now tt i got hang on this job, i guess what this job can offer to me is tt i can learn to be more merticulous or allow me to have an eye for the details as what they call it.
and it teaches me how to handle all sorts of ppl and be more daring n independent.
tt's what i wan to take away from dis job(:

i finally finished photocopying the stack of papers ben asked me to do!
ben is in the same marketing department as me..n he looks like chen xiao dong!haha
and i finally got to tok to the jap guy whom i believe is one of the big shot ppl there since he has his own room.
but he isnt in the same department as me....and he is so charming.haha.
but but but he's too old for me.
anyway i think the ppl in other departments are nicer than the one in mine
so ironic.some guy from other department offered to help me when the photocopy machine breaks down yet one of the dealer from my own department din bother to help.
are all successful businessmen tt arrogant
they treat their customers so nice n polite yet they see us as if we're some pests
n when they nid my help they wld become so sweet n nice
yucks!


sweetie came to fetech me from work today!(:
he waited 3hrs and i compensated by buying a tiramisu for him
haha.and i bought a brownie for my family.
coffeebean cakes are v nice
we ate our dinner at amoy st
and when we took my blk lift,we got stuck inside.
sweetie forced open the door and luckily after 2 attempts, the door opened
but the lift was abit higher den the sixth storey.
it's the 2nd time i got trapped in.yucks!
luckily i wasnt alone.

whee(:tmls' friday.and im gg to hand in my timesheet.
hope money will come rolling in quick!haha!
im so happyhappy(:
sam took urgent leave today so im left all alone to do double the workload
(they shld pay me double my pay!)
im so proud of myself!
i managed all the nasty customers,did all the filing,typing,phtotcopying and checking of the pending promo
and i finished all my work w/o needin to do any OT!
3days no OT alr.and i like!
so i think im getting the hang of it.
im determined to master everything den i can handle everything myself
(i can do most of the things myself alr)
so i wld nt have to ask anyone to help and have minimun interaction between the oh-so-helpful dealers.
actually my work is alright minus the nasty customers and the dealers.
but unfortunately they make up the bulk of my workload.
like i told amy,no matter how bad my work is, im gg to find pleasure in it.haha!
im just gg to do my part well and nt skip any work.
cos...i nid the money.haha!

sweetie came to fetch me from work today!
im having a daily dose of sweetie these few days(:
and it's great to see his silly old face after a long day of work!haha!
but he's going to start his another work soon.
it's gg to be tiring for him and we'll have lesser time to meet up
but it's all for valentine day and our hk trip.haha!

oh man.im having monday blues.
work wasnt as tough as expected today
except for a few hicupps here n there, sam n i managed to do only 1hr of OT today!
we're getting on the hang of it.
but still today's only monday.
and there's still 4more days to weekends
i nid some morale booster everyday
(but there'e always hardly any.ya i noe,it's more impt if it comes within myself.ya ya.)
i just have to convince myself tt everyday will be a gd day.

anyway sweetie n i are planning a trip to hongkong.
so we must work hard now to earn money now
tt's my motivation!
i shall love my job!
but u noe, i really doesnt like the ppl there.

went suntec with mummy,sis n sweetie ytd
wanted to shop for my new yr clothes but din buy anything in the end
cudnt see anything i like.
it's always like this.when im prepared to spend money,i cant see anything i like.
went down to people's park complex after tt with sweetie to check out the different travel agencies
im so excited!haha.
i wanna go hongkong!

he told me today he dun seem to uds me sometimes
just like how i dun seem to uds him sometimes
i tot we cud tok everything out.
but obviously,we misunderstood each other too often
am i being overly concern abt the us.
or shld i keep my fears/worries/feelings to myself next time?
maybe u prefer to end everything in silence.
but do u noe, ur silence hurts me the most.

hello(:
just started my work a few days ago and ive been working OT everyday
so it feels good to stay at home during the weekends...and it's spring cleaning today!
haha.
work hasnt been very good and i guess it's gg to be much worse from next week onwards.
my mentor is a srjc gal, huili and ytd was her last day of work
so from next wk onwards, it'll be only me n sam,a vjc gal and both of us are equally new
n i haven met sam before cos she has been on MC from my first day of work
hope she's a nice person and she better come on mon or i'll be alone
n it's impossible to handle all the redemption n data entry all alone
anyway im working at sharp company as temp admin
but im mostly involved in redemption of free gifts.
singaporeans are really cheapo
whenever there's free gifts, there's always long queues
some of them are really nasty
and since they are collecting the free gifts, it's expected to wait
there are alot of procedures we nid to do when processing each redemption.
and it doesnt help when some customers forget to bring the required documents such as warranty cards or invoice.
and we have to spend time politely explaining to them tt we cant give them the gifts
but very often we ended being scolded, shouted at
it's really no pt kicking a big fuss.telling me how ex the taxi fare is to cab here.how hard for u to apply for leave just to come collect the gifts.
i wld like to give them the free gifts if i can so they can stop buggin me
it's nt any of my loss anyway
but it's the company policy.
and when such situation occurs, all the big shot ppl will hide in the office n ask us, the temp staff to settle ourselves.
dis is how bad my work situation is.
all my colleagues are so much older than me.
im the xiao mei there and i can really feel generation gap with them
im directly under this hypocrite auntie, irene
whenever any probs happen, she will blame us
and say 'ive alr told u dis told u tt n u still let it happen.'
huili n me dislike her alot. but unfortuantely i have to work with her tt closely everyday.
damn.
she has been in this company for 20 years n everyone is licking her boot.
damn disgusting can
only huili n me are rude to her.she doesnt deserve our respect
she also makes alot of mistakes in her accounting
n we have to stayed back late to spot her mistakes
n for a single mistake i made, she brought it up to me agn n agn n made sure everyone in my marketing department noe.
but i dun really care.im only a contract temp staff.once my contract's over, bye bye.
im gone. i dun give a damn.

anyway huili has been scaring me.
her contract supposed to end at the same time as me
but she choose to breach the contract n compensate the company
n dis compensation amt is higher than her pay! 2k plus.
but she says she cudnt take the stress n the OT any longer
she rather lose out n pay.
these 3 days i was feeling rather safe cos she handled most of the nasty customers
i was shielded from many scoldings.
but after she's gone, i duno if i cud handle them
n i haven really unds how to do the registered mail.
hope sam will noe.haha.

got quite a few of the managers there are jap cos sharp is a jap brand
the nicest person there is peter.
he's very nice n fatherly
he's the senior manager there.
he helped us settle alot of our probs unlike irene who only ask us to tell the customer dis n tt n push us to confront the customers alone.
dun really noe the other dealers there n their company
and this is quite bad cos i'll nid their help quite often too.
i just dun have the motivation to noe them
i just wan to sit there quietly n do my stuff.
but nope, my job requires loads of talking, walking n interacting.

ytd i was invited to their sharp fair dinner.
but huili n me decided to give it a miss
cos we dun wan to entertain them after a long day of work
n nobody's our age is gg.so we feel out of place.
she dun feel attached to the company n i dun think i will in the next mth.
just wan to do my job well each day.earn money n den go hm.nth more.
n anyway the pay isnt high too.

i wish we have some staff benefits
im not talking abt free tv or ovens, fridges etc
nt tt i mind if they do give me these for free
but i just wan the free gifts(eg taka vouchers!!!) n some vouchers for buying electrical applicances
if tt really happens,my dad will be very happy.lol.
but forget abt tt, i just hope they dun eat into my lunch time
even if we go for lunch ltr than 12pm cos there's still customers,
we still nid to come back at 1pm.yucks.
i feel like they are abusing us.

im just looking forward to weekends....n my pay day.
haha.

work's starting tml(:
im quite looking forward to it.
i was told tt this job requires frequent daily OT
really hope so cos i wanna earn more money before CNY.
moolahs moolahs here i can(:(:

went town today to sign my contract
met up with yanyi after tt to window-shop(:(:
haven been stepping into town for quite some time to shop
and i miss shopping so much.
shopping=trying out clothes AND buying those clothes, bags,shoes i like
i wish i'll get my pay soon(even thou i haven really started working.lol!)
been eyeing on loads of prettypretty stuff.
anyway we did some catching up and we talked abt alot of stuff
and i really miss her(:(:
all of us is so busy with our own work
i wish we cud hang out more often jus to chill

last sat was spent with sweetie.
went to t3 and it's so gorgeous.
many shops were nt open yet
so we headed down to tampines after tt.
bought one cardigen(: and i saw a really pretty clutch.
i think it's such a babe.like i say i wish i'll get my pay soon(:

and on some long overdue post,
i went to the inter-jc pageant at arena on 5 jan
it was so crowded.
but i managed to get to the front and have pretty gd view
went down with sweetie and his team mates
din support anyone in particular..just went there to have fun
after the competition, we danced for quite a while
but it was really so crowded and the songs were repeating
i really hate dancing when the dancefloor is so crowded.
you'll get pushed, stepping on,shoved and it's so irritating.
and it spoils my mood.
left at 2am plus and walked to maxwell market to eat with sweetie n his team
the feeling of walking with you late at night is just so sweet and comfortable(:
i wanna walk with you forever and ever(:(:
reached hm at 5.30am
and sweetie slept over my hse(:

waking up 6am every day is so so tiring
i cant rmb how did i survive waking up even earlier when im still schooling.
been working at dis company for the past week
shant not disclose the company name
working here is quite gd
it's so free and easy
nobody really supervise us and we can sit cross legged w/o our shoes on.
nobody cares how long is our lunch break
and the office is pretty cosy
im sharing a office with another temp gal, li rong
she's from ajc and she's a very nice n cheery person
we started on the same day of work so at least we have each other for lunch!
she really makes my life at work so much more bearable.
the first 3 days of work was quite horrible thou.
ive got to face the comp for 9 hrs each day typing in thousands of lucky draw forms
and i get really bad backaches from tt.i feel so old.lol.
it's like repeating the same thing for a thousand times just tt the name n the particulars are diff
the challenging part was tt the handwriting on the forms was so hard to make out
and the hardest thing to do there was for us nt to whine n complain abt the endless pile.
haha.
luckily they din give us a deadline for completing these forms.
and just when we tot tt we have finally done with the forms n data entry on day two,
we were given another few stacks of membership cards to type in the particulars
this time was worse cos there were more fields to fill in

wed was worse cos im left all alone cos lirong took half day off
thurs became better cos our comp finally has internet access!
n we were asked to find pictures regarding the new project tt they are embarking on
so it's really cool tt we get paid for surfing the net
looking for pretty clothes, sexy n hot babes etc
and specifically we were asked to surf those online shopping blogs,facebk etc!
n of cos being so internet deprived ppl for 3 days alr, we started surfing for our own stuff
we logged into msn, started blogging and playing facebk games
but we've been looking for the pictures since ytd afternoon
and nobody has come to ask us if we're done.
so we're wondering just how many pictures do they want.

dun really noe other ppl except the advertising n promotion department
cos we're like in our small room, so isolated from everyone else whr most of their working place is just a table.
But the advertising people are very nice n frenly

i feel so kiam trying to save on my transport fee
and walking to the company every morning from the mrt station is so tiring.
practically nobody from my company walks from the mrt to the company
the journey is long, and it's upslope.
but the transport fee is like such a huge diff from the student fare
luckily lirong always walks back with me after work(:

i dislike rejection.
cant help it but it makes me feel so useless
everytime i'll go with a hopeful and optimistic mindset
hoping that all will go well
but so far, i have all come back feeling dejected
and nobody cares.
nobody is supportive of wad im doing
nobody even tries to uds wad i wan and how i feel
and nobody bothers to help me.
so are u the NOBODY?

i noe everyone is busy with their own lives.
they have their own probs too
so i shldnt bother them with mine too.
mine is forever so minor as compared to theirs.
this world is abt ourselves anyway
nobody has any obligations to help other ppl
u wun be so lucky to get a helping hand always
so pls grow up.
we're all alone in this world.

stop picking at every of my personalities and make it seems like a flaw.